I am not my condition and neither can it be an excuse to play small! Not on my watch.
I am blessed to have some wonderful tools in my tool box of life. Tools like The Big 3.
Let me use a personal experience to explain how this tool works and how powerful it is.
You see I KNOW that I will not be defined by my newly diagnosed condition – Type 1 Diabetes (T1D). That means that I will not use T1D as an excuse for playing a smaller game. In fact, my intention is to step up into a whole new potential full of new challenges and opportunities because of T1D. Yes, I have had this conversation with myself and we have an implied contractual agreement (me, myself and I) – there is no backing out.
With this knowing and with these intentions I am in a position to observe my thoughts and behaviours – to keep tabs on myself – to notice when I might teeter towards the low road – to be very AWARE of how I am being. And I have teetered. Yes there have been wobbly moments. A few months in and I have had to pull rank. I heard myself making excuses for not doing what needed to be done. I am not talking about activities that would be harmful to my health – I am being a responsible adult here (well most of the time).
The internal dialogue went something like this.
It’s ok, it has only been a few months and it looks like it might rain, start running next week. And then there was – it’s ok, your eyesight has not yet recovered, don’t overdo things, you can start writing in earnest next week.
Blah… blah… blah! Really!! What happened to the intentions you had for you? Where is your sense of urgency? Are you really going to let yourself down? Do you remember why you planned to run and to write? What about that extraordinary life you aspire to? Take a look at your vision for you? Do you want it? Do you really want it? Come on let’s go and make stuff happen!
Yes it was time to INFLUENCE my thoughts, to shift my state, to challenge the validity of the excuses, to nip this small way of being in the bud.
These conversations you have with yourself may be the most important conversations you will ever have.
The BIG 3 process is a 24/7 story – it should be on continuous loop. It requires diligence and a sharp sense of awareness. The Limiter can emerge at any time encouraging you to play small. Stay alert to thoughts that don’t serve you. The Leader must be able to see through the Limiter’s façade and must know what needs to be said to take back control. The Limiter can put up strong persistent arguments. Stay with it – it will take perseverance.
1. KNOW what your intentions are for you. KNOW how you need to be in the context of enabling your extraordinary life to turn up. KNOW what being on purpose looks like.
2. Be AWARE of how you are being moment to moment and notice when you are off track. Listen to your internal dialogue.
3. Then be able to INFLUENCE yourself to get back on track – find out what it takes for you to reset, to stand up and take notice, to be persuaded to choose the high road.
It works for me – every time. It works for me because my intentions align with the plan I have for my life. It works because I am totally enrolled in my life plan. It works because I know why I am on this earth for this time. It works because I have amazing stuff to do and waiting for me to get over myself is not an option. Playing small will not happen on my watch. And I’m watching!
What about you? How could you incorporate this tool into your life? Could you be making excuses to support playing a smaller game?